What is Sex all About?

That is the question, is it not? 

Now the participants of Choice were given a few topics on which we were to stage a play and this was the topic given to my group. One can only imagine the teasing which took place when our peers realized that this was the topic given. I mean how does one stage a play on sex ? It took me awhile to think of a story-line, a few days of musing before I finally decided that I would write a story on relationships of which Sex would be its main theme. 

I  wrote a story on the heartache, grief, and triumphs of one girl who overcame an abusive relationship of which her boyfriend had attempted to coerce her into having sex with him and when she refused, he began to cheat on her. Now why did I write the story this way instead of perhaps touching on other issues such as prostitution etc ? Its because through my own experience and that of others I have come to see that so many of us have experienced deep sorrow and anguish in the relationships we have been in. Many then who watched this play of ours might be able to relate to the characters in the play for more likely than not would they have found themselves in a similar position before. 

Mary our mother is always there for us!

As I developed the characters, they became real to me. The girl in my story, I needed to ensure that she would convey a very important message to my audience, the message being while we love our partners with our whole hearts, once there is some form of abuse or cheating, its okay to walk away, its okay to put ourselves first, and most importantly it is okay to say no. Be it man or woman, whoever exercises their right to say no to sex, no one can or should attempt/ force them to change their mind. Sex should be between two consenting adults who trust each other, where such intimacy is used as an expression of love. We need to all understand however that before we can love others we need to love ourselves first and sometimes that would mean walking away from the ones we love. 

I strongly believe that God has a plan for us all. Our failed relationships teaches us important lessons on life and how we wish to be treated. I for one can say that I’ve emerged a stronger and wiser woman. I’ve grown and overcome many trials that have come my way and looking back I see now what I could not see then, that is, no one will have it easy in this journey called life. How we deal with our problems will determine how successful we eventually are. Hence, to sum it up, my play was a story of a young girl and how she overcame the crosses in her life.

                                                   

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To my readers, spare me a few more moments of your time as I touch ever so briefly on 3 other plays that took place on that memorable day. The other groups were given topics on belonging, masks we wear in our daily lives as well as reconciliation with our past mistakes. Boy must I say all performed splendidly. I watched my close friends pretend to be thugs, police officers, waiters, each and every one of them told a story so befitting to the topics given to them. The way the plays were staged left me in stitches, to say I was howling in laughter would be an understatement. Truly engaging and entertaining were they. 

I noticed as well that each of us staged a play on relationships, be it relationships with our peers, our families or our significant others. That made me realize that so many of us face the same struggle, the struggle being how do we mend the brokenness in our lives and relationships? Well that is the real question is it not? And while I do not have a definite answer to such an important question as yet, what I can say I learnt from friends and facilitators at Choice is that we’re all a work in progress. We try and fail and try again to mend our relationships and what counts is that we keep trying. At the end of the day its okay to not be okay for in this chaos that is life we have been lucky to have found a group of like-minded people to support us in our struggles and celebrate with us during our triumphs. I thank the Choice team for encouraging us to stage these plays for it has brought us all just that much closer.

Sincerely,

Nicole CEKL102